Let me paint the picture for you. You have been up all night and dealing with a teething baby all day. The dishes are piled high, the laundry hasn’t been touched in days, you aren’t sure when the last time you actually showered was, and now your partner wants to start kissing your neck? “Are you kidding me?” may be what is running through your head but the necessary glue that binds intimate relationships together is the physical connection.
Unfortunately, many a partner does not understand the extreme fatigue that can come over a new mom, or worse, they may back off completely because they are worried about your level of duress, but ladies, this is an area you need to pay close attention to. Remember those days before baby when you could spend hours behind a closed door with your partner? You couldn’t imagine anything sexier and just thinking of him “in that way” could bring a flutter to your stomach? You have to recapture those days. That is the glue that binds parents together in the thick of parenting when the kids are sick, the car breaks down, and the in-laws come for a visit, whatever life throws at you. The intimacy is an area that you need to keep yourselves together.
Let’s talk spicy now. Leave him notes about his physical characteristics that you find attractive. Leave a note in his top drawer, his wallet, the driver’s seat of his car. Let him know that you still find him very attractive and you think of him often, even if you aren’t physically near him. Men really do like to know that their partners find them sexy.
Find time for a quick shower and some of those sexy undies that have long since been hidden in the back of the lingerie drawer. I know they may not fit exactly like they did before but the sheer effort of your trying to recreate that sexy you will likely make him feel very special.
Whisper something naughty to him in public. Use your imagination ladies, tell him what you want to do later, tell him something about his physical attribute, tell him what article of clothing you aren’t wearing and let his imagination run wild.
Check out that Snap chat App that gets teens in trouble for sexting…then maybe use it to your intimate advantage with your partner, the pictures disappear after a matter of seconds and you may be able to make him blush.
Invite him into the shower. Spend a quick 5-10 minutes alone while baby naps, just claim that you are conserving water.
It doesn’t really matter what you do but taking the steps now to rebuild that connection that turned you into parents in the first place is vitally important. Simple things that you do now will serve you very well as you navigate the roads of parenthood together. Just remember, this is the guy you fell in love with in the first place, be sure to show him so you can keep the spice alive.